The Man Who Came to Dinner (1942)

Okay, so maybe William Keighley's The Man Who Came to Dinner isn't exactly a "Christmas movie' per se, but it does take place at Christmas time, and it is a movie, so it fits in my book. Besides, it is also one of the most deliciously, wickedly funny movies ever made. Sheridan Whiteside (Monty Woolley) and his personal secretary, Maggie Cutler (Bette Davis) travel from New York City to Ohio for a dinner at the home of Mr. and Mrs. Stanley (Grant Mitchell and Billie Burke). As he is walking up the front steps, "Sherry" falls and injures his back. Much to Sherry's dismay, the doctor says that he must rest until he heals completely. In short order Sherry takes over the Stanley's home, ordering them about as if they were servants and generally wreaking havoc upon everyone who comes within his sights. When Maggie falls in love with Brett Jefferson (Richard Travis), the editor of the local paper, Sherry calls in his friend, the gorgeous actress Lorraine Sheldon ( Ann Sheridan), to lure Jefferson away from Maggie. When she discovers the plot, Maggie quits, leaving Sherry high and dry.

In a panic, Sherry calls on another actor, Beverly Carlton (Reginald Gardner), to drag Lorraine away from Jefferson. That plot fails, an infuriated Lorraine becomes more determined than ever to take Jefferson away from Maggie, and Maggie is more determined than ever to quit Sherry's employ. What's more, Mr. Stanley gets a court order evicting Sherry and his entire entourage in one hour. At the last moment, Sherry's old friend Banjo (Jimmy Durante) shows up and removes Lorraine from the picture in a fashion that I won't divulge. Sherry then turns the tables on the Stanleys when he discovers that Mr. Stanley's sister, Harriet (Ruth Vivian) is a notorious ax-murderer, a bit of knowledge the Stanley's are eager to suppress. Sherry blackmails the Stanleys into letting him stay a while longer. He also forces them to loosen their grip on their two children, who want to follow their own paths in life, not their parents'. When Sherry finally leaves, he takes with him the Stanleys' servants, who are more than eager to go with him. As he waves goodbye, Sherry slips on the ice yet again. You can guess the rest.

So what does any of this have to do with Christmas? Nothing whatsoever. Isn't that great? All of the madness simply takes place at Christmas time. In fact Sherry is forced to deliver his annual Christmas broadcast from the Stanleys' living room as his nurse and doctor attempt to herd a flock of penguins and a boys choir sings in the background. It's all madness and fun, and it's all Monty Woolley. Yes, Bette Davis may have gotten top billing, but this is Woolley's movie from start to finish. Davis plays second fiddle to him all the way through. And how could she not? I don't think anyone in movie history has gotten such great dialogue, with the possible exception of Groucho Marx. Referring to Harriet Stanley, Sherry declares, "She's right out of The Hound of the Baskervilles." When he hires the Stanley's servants from them, the Stanley's protest that they've been with them for year, to which Sherry retorts, "I'm commuting their sentence." And he refers to Maggie as "this aging debutante...[whom] I retain in my employ only because she is the sole support of her two-headed brother." But most of his acerbic wit is reserved for his nurse, poor Miss Preen (Mary Wickes in her first screen role). He tells her at one point, "Go in an read the life of Florence Nightingale and learn how unfitted you are to your chosen profession," and at another time he tells her, "My great aunt Jennifer ate a whole box of candy everyday of her life. She lived to be 102, and when she had been dead three days, she looked better than you do now." Face it, you just can't compete with lines like those, especially when you're playing a love-struck secretary.

Then only other character that even begins to compete with Sherry, is that of Banjo, who was based on Harpo Marx. Jimmy Durante has great fun with him. In fact, most of the characters in the movie were based on famous people. Sheridan Whiteside's character was based on noted film critic Alexander Woollcott, who was a good friend of the authors of the stage play, Moss Hart and George S. Kauffman. The character of Maggie Cutler was based on Algonquin Round Table member Dorothy Parker, Lorraine Sheldon was based on Gertrude Lawrence, and Beverly Carlton was based on Noel Coward. Even Harriet, Mr. Stanley's the ax-murdering sister, was based on a famous person - Lizzie Borden.

So, no, there's not a lot in this movie about Christmas. It's just a whole lot of fun, and it's a nice break during the chaos that occurs around Christmas. The Man Who Came to Dinner is rated G and has a runtime of 112 minutes. It is filmed in glorious black-and-white, of course.

The Petrified Forest (1936)

Far out in the Arizona desert sits a small gas station and diner. It's a dusty, ramshackle sort of place, the kind of establishment that used to dot the landscape of rural America in the days before cookie-cutter chain gas stations and fast food joints moved in. You can fill your tank, check your oil, make sure your radiator is topped off, then grab a bite to eat and be on your way again. You always go on your way again. This is the kind of place that people pass through. No one ever stops here. It's run by Jason Maple (Porter Hall), a veteran of World War I and a man of no importance except in his own mind. He's helped out by his father, Gramps (Charlie Grapewin), and his daughter, Gabrielle (Bette Davis). There are a couple of hired hands too - a cook (Nina Campana) and a gas pump attendant named Boze (Dick Foran). Together, they keep the place running, feed the hungry customers and their thirsty cars. Jason and Gramps dream of their past glories; Gabrielle dreams of her future ones. She wants to leave Arizona, wants to go to Paris where her mother lives, wants to study art. But this is 1936, in the middle of the Great Depression, and money is tight. Boze thinks he knows what Gabrielle really needs. You can guess what that is.

One day, Alan Squire (Leslie Howard) stumbles into this enclave of desperation and longing. He's hitchhiking across the country, heading to California. He has a notion that he'd like to see the Pacific Ocean, thinks it would be a good place to drown himself. When Alan and Gabrielle meet, the air crackles with electricity. These are two kindred spirits, meant for each other. And in a fairer universe, they would have been. But Alan, a man who has failed at everything, is worn out, weary of the world. Gabrielle is young and in love with life and dreaming of all that she is going to do. She's not yet known the bitterness of disappointment, of failure, of love gone sour, of life's dreams unfulfilled. Life to her is still a Christmas present with the paper on it, and she's giddy with the anticipation of opening it. Alan's already opened it. All he got was coal. But Alan believes in Gabrielle. He praises her paintings. Encourages her to follow her dreams, not Boze's or her father's. She gives him a free meal and a dollar. Arranges a ride for him with a wealthy couple who are passing through. They part reluctantly.

And here the story might have ended, were it not for Duke Mantee (Humphrey Bogart). Mantee is a bank robber and a murderer - a character modelled on John Dillinger - on the lamb with his gang. They're heading for Mexico, when their car breaks down. They steal the car owned by the wealthy couple that Alan is riding in. While the couple's chauffeur attempts to get the stalled car running again, Alan hoofs it back to the gas station, fearing for Gabrielle's safety. When he gets there, Mantee and his gang have already arrived. Alan joins the hostages. Soon the wealthy couple shows up, and they're taken hostage too. Now begins a tense stand-off, a handful of unarmed citizens held by a bunch of armed thugs. But Mantee has a soft spot. He's waiting for a girl. Mantee, the famous killer, is in love, and that love will be his downfall. When the cops arrive, as we know they will, bullets fly. I won't say anymore. Don't wanna give away the ending. Best watch yourself to see who lives, who dies, who's stuck in the petrified forest, and who leaves.

Archie Mayo's The Petrified Forest is one of the most outstanding films ever made. Based on the stage play by Robert E. Sherwood, almost all of the action takes place in or outside of the little dessert gas station. This gives the film a claustrophobic feeling, one that is helped by the immensity of the Arizona dessert that forms the backdrop for all that happens. This was Bogart's breakout role. Of course, he had been in other movies, had made twelve films in the previous eight years, including two with Bette Davis. But his portrayal of the cold-blooded killer, Duke Mantee, is what made Bogart a household name. Bogart had starred in the stage play with Leslie Howard. When Warner Brothers decide to do the film, Howard was asked to reprise his role, but the studio wanted Edward G. Robinson to play Duke Mantee. Howard refused to do the film unless Bogart was given the part of Mantee. WB gave in. The rest, as they say, is movie history.

There's a lot of desperation in The Petrified Forest. A lot of hope and idealism too, and some pretty heroic stuff going on. You'll want to see for yourself. You won't regret that you did.

The Petrified Forest is rated G and is filmed in glorious black and white.